Yes, I am a little hormonal this week but I am seriously sitting on my couch with tears running down my face as I watched the first episode of a new show on NBC, called First Dates. I recorded this show, because dating is my business and I was curious to see what it was all about. Truth be told, I really didn’t think I would enjoy watching it let alone have it evoke any kind of emotion (though I should have known better – it’s produced by Ellen DeGeneres).
If you follow me and this blog, you know that I teach women how to find gratifying relationships through dating apps. I teach them how to meet nice, respectful men – but not necessarily for a relationship that would lead to marriage. I teach them to get comfortable with their singleness and their bodies and to enjoy life right now. No more dieting. No more searching for Mr. Right. I teach women to be authentic about who they are and what and who they want in their lives.
I date a lot. I am a first date expert. But I date to make friends, have companionship and ultimately have a good lover in my life. Good sex has been the goal for me since I got divorced. And experiencing the freedom of not really getting involved in a relationship has been amazing. No more compromises. No commitments to anyone. Respectful, reciprocal, casual relationships with nice men has been the goal. Not anything that pulls at my emotions. And certainly not love.
So, the show is about couples of all different ages and races, meeting for a blind date at one of my favorite restaurants in Chicago, MK. The entire date is filmed and then they put the couple on camera and ask them point blank if they want to see each other again. Three of the couples had dates that were entertaining to watch. Two didn’t work out and the other one agreed to a second date.
Then there was a couple, probably in their 70’s. They had each lost their spouse in the last two years and it was the very first time either of them had dared to go out on a date. You could see a spark in both of their eyes when they met. There was an immediate and palatable connection. They talked about their plans for the future, where they wanted to travel, bucket-list wishes. Then they talked about losing their spouses. They both teared up and I did too!
I don’t want anything to do with love and yet their love stories about their deceased spouses and the thought that they might enjoy time together now was really just so touching.
Clearly there is something deep inside me (or maybe not so deep) that does like the idea of love. The idea of feeling love. The idea of being in love.
At the end of the show, the maitre d, says “L’amore è un viaggio, non una destinazione. Non mollare mai.” – Love is a journey, not a destination. Never give up.