This week is a bit of a dating reset for me. I had a lovely summer thing (which meant a very nice dinner once a week followed by even yummier sex). It started as a complete rebound for me and ended without confrontation or even discussion. We wanted different things and it didn’t need to be spoken. A break up without breaking up. It ended perfectly. But I still miss how sexually open that guy allowed me to be. Damn it.
Since, there have been a couple reunions which have been fun. Then I met a seemingly interesting man on Happn’ (a dating app that tells you how many times you cross paths with someone). He reached out to me (apparently we crossed 136 times) and we met for a drink and then he proceeded to become my “text boyfriend” for the following 4 weeks… he would text me good morning, good night, and usually two other times a day. I don’t think I initiated once the entire time. It seemed nice and endearing at first, then it was just annoying because I’d rather just see him (there were many excuses of why we didn’t meet up again – I won’t bore you…). This week I called bullshit on the whole thing and well, he stopped texting. Lol. Weirdo. Who knows. Worse, he was 40 years old. I actually was attempting to date someone my own age! #DatingFail #YoungerMenAreBetter
Meanwhile, the seasons are changing, there is a chill in the air, I just bought a condo and moved (and simplified my “stuff”) and it’s time for an interesting new man in my life! What would Anne do #WWAD? Tinder, of course! I hadn’t opened the Tinder app for 4 or 5 months (might be a record since the discovery of said app), and the selection of attractive men did not disappoint. I did a quick update of my profile – adding in something about bonus points for being able to teach me either a) a foreign language (oh, how I love dating men from other cultures!) or b) how to salsa (i have always wanted to learn…) including emojis for all – I’m so fucking cool (yes, sarcasm).
And, as part of your profile on Tinder, you can now connect to a song (which they call an “anthem”) on Spotify. So after some thought I connected to Blackbird, the Sarah McLachlan version. I love the lyrics and the whole idea of “you were only waiting for this moment to arise” and the idea of my wings “being broken” and learning to fly after divorce. Turns out it is really about the struggle of African-Americans in the southern states, according to Paul McCartney. But he also has been quoted as saying it is about awakening on a deeper level – so I choose to go with this explanation. It’s all about freedom in both cases. Plus, I love it and could listen to it over and over. And I do.
So now I will go on several dates to see who might be next. I matched with a guy who used to live on the same floor at my last place of residence, so we’ve already met in person. Potentially interesting. I matched with a M&A consultant who is only in Chicago for a month (and lives in India) – could be fun hotel sex, super cultural and intense. I matched with a guy who works at a startup near my office, who was aggressive (in a good way) about getting a date on the calendar. I matched with a few others who will either step up or not. And so begins the process. It’s all about being in the moment with whoever is in front of me. No checklists. No expectations. Let the adventure begin. Happy Fall! Happy dating!!
Life is complicated, dating doesn’t have to be. Sign-up for tips, tactics and insights on how to navigate this new online world of dating like a boss!
What do you think?