Originally published on Grown-up Women.
I have previously written about my experience with the dating app, Bumble, which is touted as the feminist version of Tinder. Bumble was developed by Whitney Wolfe and a group of former Tinder employees and works very much like Tinder, but after a match has been confirmed the woman has to be the one to reach out first. Within 24 hours. Or the guy disappears completely. This is where a little bit of my disconnect happens with this app. You know I am a huge fan of the man reaching out first – I just have better luck that way and I’m a little old-fashioned. About some things… I also like that men have to put in the effort to say something clever as an opening line. It’s actually a big part of my “weeding out” process, and Bumble takes this element out of said process for me.
However, Bumble has evolved over the past couple years and they now offer men the option to “extend” for 24 hours. When this happens you get a notification that lets you know the matched man has extended (and I think they only get one per day or they have to pay for it) and then it’s up to you still if you want to initiate a chat. I usually do at this point. You know they are willing to reach out if they could.
Bumble Boost is also a new premium feature. A subscription unlocks the users that have swiped right on your profile – which means that you can choose to match with them immediately. It also allows you to re-match with expired connections – so no more missed matches! They have a lot of different pricing options, all the way from $4.99/week to $6.00/month (if you are willing to commit to 6 months). I have not personally tried Bumble Boost, but it’s a cool feature. I mean for 5 bucks you can check it out for a week and see what you think.
So the trick now is that you have to initiate the conversation so give it your best shot. Make the first line personal by using their first name. Or ask them about a specific photo or give them a compliment about something you’ve seen on their profile. You’ve been put in a position on this app where you need to make an impression, so it’s now up to you. And whatever you do, don’t ask a yes or no question. Ask something that requires him to think about his response and tell you something that will help you decide if you want to meet up. Always remember you are in control here. If a man ever says something your don’t like, feel free to unmatch!
I do think Bumble yields a slightly higher quality of men (though you will run across many of the same you’ve seen on Tinder and will match with them on both apps!). Per my other post, it’s as if Whitney and gang put a nice filter on these guys to help them out. And that’s fine by me.
Happy Bumbling ladies!